women managers need sponsors not mentors

To get to the top levels in an organization, we need a sponsor in the executive ranks. 


This means someone to advocate for us, to position us in high visibility roles, to introduce us to leaders and help us forge relationships with these people, to help us navigate the politics... someone who will use some of their own political capital to pull us along.


The Center for Work-Life Policy (CWLP) is releasing a study next month in the Harvard Business Review showing that women are not making it to the top ranks of leadership because they don't have the powerful backing required to push them there.


I've been calling these advocates "mentors". My coach and marketing guru has argued consistently that we can't have good mentors inside our own organization. I finally get it (thanks Mike). What we need are not mentors, what we need are SPONSORS. Mentors give advise and perspective. Sponsors aggressively pull you into the leadership ranks. Definitely need both... but mentors alone will not get you to the highest levels.


The CWLP says that having a sponsor boosts your prospect of advancement by 19% for women (and 23% for men).


So what is keeping women from getting these sponsors to help us along? 


Theory #1 - this relationship looks sketchy


I forwarded this article to my colleague and said I saw her having a very solid sponsor behind her in her last job. Then she reminded me of another situation...

She had a great sponsor... an influential leader, well networked, and able to pull her along to the highest visibility projects. He spent a huge amount of time with her, coaching her, introducing her formally and informally to the "right" people, supporting her through rough situations, providing air cover as she learned, and continuing to be her advocate at the leadership levels. This required a lot of time. Unfortunately one of his peers assumed they must be having an affair and reported it to HR. I can't imagine the embarrassment on both sides as they defended themselves publicly and privately. 

So the typical sponsor relationship can look a lot like an affair. A lot of wonderful opportunities are missed because men and women on both sides are reluctant to be perceived in this way.


But if the risk of people making incorrect assumptions is keeping us from forming these powerful relationships, how else do we get ahead? Can we make it less risky?


Theory #2 - we aren't comfortable creating these type of relationships


Having this sort of sponsor relationship will make us stand out as something special. We will get attention from our peers and our bosses. For women who have been trained not to brag and not to stand out from their peers, this can be really uncomfortable. It just takes a "who does she think she is" to make us wonder if it is worth it. 


I've seen women try to balance this by being totally self effacing about the relationship to the point that it is embarrassing. They won't take any credit for being worth this effort or even wanting to have this sort of attention. 


I wish we could be thrilled for ourselves and for our colleagues when one of us manages to get this level of support. This is good for all of us.