Communication tips to help you get the respect you deserve

We are planning our next executive women's networking event. We will explore how to communicate and build relationships to achieve greater respect.

As always, the timing is perfect. This week I was shown that this is something I need to continue to work on. sigh... another learning opportunity.

As part of our planning, we shared our personal stories and listed our top 10 tips - based on our research, our experiences, and the stories we have heard. We will continue to refine our list after the event but here is our initial draft. Would love your thoughts, additions, and stories.

In creating this list we found many examples of when we missed the mark and how annoyed we get at others who can't get it right. It seems that we only hurt ourselves - our credibility, our trustworthiness, and our ability to be respected - when we can't get it right.  

1. Clearly communicate what is expected—the job and the working relationship—make sure people really get it
2. Listen, read the signals, and communicate appropriately—able to figure out what is really going on in the organization, in the hierarchy, and in relationships
3. Provide objective, direct feedback in a way that can be heard and is valued—leave people wanting to hear more
4. Always avoid gossiping about people—it is not constructive and shows you can’t be trusted
5. Explain when information is needed to make a decision, when a decision is made, and why that decision was made—especially to people who will not be satisfied with the decision
6. Explain what is going on behind closed doors—why certain people are involved and others are not
7. Keep conversations confidential—if in doubt ask but never share a conversation without permission
8. Use conversations to help people solve their own problems, clear obstacles, and listen—don’t jump in with solutions
9. Respect other’s time—schedule time to talk (limit busting in unexpected), give them time to prepare, and keep it on topic
10. Take time to let things work themselves out before jumping in—respond after giving yourself time to calmly assess the situation and always avoid email arguments